There was a man on a park bench and he saw a duck fly by so he decided to go and see what it was up to. He saw that it was just going for a swim in a near by pond. He died 2 years ago of auto erotic asphyxiation because of a common fetish.

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How do you mess with Helen Keller? Move all the furniture in her room.

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what's one thing we're all tired of but they still make? Those crappy love songs.

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why didnt the chicken cross the road? It was getting tired of the jokes

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Me, myself, and I walked into a bar. We didn't say anything to each other because I'm not schetsophrenic.

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YOUIR MAMA IS SO UGLY THAT SHE MIGHT WANT TO LOOK INTO PLASTIC SURGERY TO BETTER HER APPEARENCE

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. WHAT?! You are about to die and be eaten.

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Q: What did the alcoholic get for his Birthday?\ A: A Jail Sentence

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A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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Wy was the lamp crying, because his mother turned into mashed potatoes.

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What happens when you cross a starfish with a dog? Dogs and starfish are from a different phylum. They are genetically incompatible.

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a man asked another man what time its it. The man responded by telling him the time and asking why he wanted to know. "thats none of your business" he replied. Why did he say it was none of his business? A- because it was none of his business.

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Got no dick? Then you're probably a girl.

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How do you stop an alcoholic from drinking ? You leave him in the desert for 4 days, eventually he'll die from dehydration .

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a kangaroo walks in to a bar and sits down. Kangaroo's live in Auustralia

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Q: What did Stevie Wonder eat for dinner last night? A: Something consumable

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An early Jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody and then delivered by railcar to a camp where he and other persecuted minorities are deliberately imprisoned in a relatively small space with inadequate facilities where they await their mass execution.

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what happened to the guy that got attacked by a shark he died

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Q: what weighs 6 ounces sits in a tree and is very deadly? A: a sparrow with a machine gun

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larry clark i smoke pot and im gay its phillup

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Have you heard the joke that they don't tell retarded people? You haven't? Well then alright let me tell you because it's actually quite amusing.

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ask if someone wants to hear a joke then say "never mind"

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whats worse than forgetting to buy cinnamon toast crunch at the grocery store? Getting beat to death with a gallon of rotten milk...

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why did the chicken cross the road? the holocaust

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops