What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A Holocaust survivor.

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What is an Anti-Joke? This is.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I am a dog

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When I was a kid, I had a clown at my birthday party. He molested me. Later I found out the clown was my dad.

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Does it not sound kinda fun to keep slapping someone that always turns the other cheek?

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What did the mexican get for his brthday? A potatoe

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Why was the little boy so bad at the piano? It was his first time playing it.

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Snausages.

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I saw a butterfly yesterday with no wings so I poured some red bull on it and BAM! it drowned.

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The lemons on the tree are ripe. They will be picked.

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Joanna walks up to a random house, knocks on the door,"Is this where the party's at?!"

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What's spongy and smells of treacle? Treacle sponge

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Whats white and looks like a bunny? a rabbit

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There once was a man from Peru, Who fell into an extremely deep sleep and woke up just before he choked to death on his shoe rubber.

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why did summer hit the child because the child is jackson

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Pete and Repete are sitting on a fence. Pete falls off. Pete suffers from a scraped knee and a bruised tailbone.

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How do you burn a lot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

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If a man has a gun, but no arms or legs, is he armed?

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?" The man responds "I'd like to hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance covered everything." The man hangs his head and tears up as he asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor heads for the door as he answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments or appointments will be paid for." The man snaps his fingers and says "I should've voted Democrat!"

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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whats orange, nocturnal, and hurts to the touch? The sun or an orange owl... Depends on your preference

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What did the volcano say to the other volcano? Nothing, Volcanoes are inanimate objects that do not possess the ability to speak.

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Q: What's white, sticky, and is swallowed by most women? A: Ice Cream

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Two men are sitting on a park bench discussing the anatomy of goats. Where is Bertha? Teaching the principals of mathematics to blind orphins in Moscow, Russia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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