How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

What did the pope do when he saw the grinch? He prayed for his soul.

Why did Justin Beiber cross the road? He didn't because he is still in the closet!

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

William and Kate do get off their ass and do something useful for once instead of hogging the cover of intouch magazine.

Whats big, purple and hairy. Has 4 eyes and 2 brains? Nothing.

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dumpster full of dead babies? There isn't a Ferrari in my garage.

Two gay guys walk into a Hooters... They order cheese fries and enjoy their meal.

how do you warm someone up? you set their house on fire.

if a dinosaurs could talk, what would they say nothing their all dead

what do you call a disabled black man getting beat up? an unfortunate human

You can eat a pie. You can eat a chicken. But you cannot eat a human being because that would be called cannibalism and cannibalism is a felony that can give the government a right to hold you in an international detainment facility for up to 40 years.

who drinks pee? katness

If life gives you lemons, you shoud be thankful it didn't give you AIDS.

whats red that looks like ketchup taste like ketchup and is't tomato sorce? ketchup

what did the black guy say to the other black guy? good morning

What is the favorite song of Lady Di? no, that is a dead person and must be respected.

Your mom is so stupid she went back to collage and got her masters n buissnes.

Knock Knock Who's there? Frank Frank who? I killed your grandma

A tiger walks into a bar. Clearly there is something wrong with animal control.

A blonde, brunette and redhead are stuck on an island that is a mile away from any civilisation.The blonde decides to swim to find help. The blonde swims half a mile, has a rest and then carries on swimming.

What do you call a submarine full of soldiers shot by a torpedo? Tragic war heros, that we will remember and honor

My brother found snow in his hair from last year... only people who know me know this joke!!haha -sopie

Roses are Red Violets are blue Goldfish

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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