Why did the Blonde say something stupid? Because she is stupid

thumb_up thumb_down +152

What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

You can eat a pie. You can eat a chicken. But you cannot eat a human being because that would be called cannibalism and cannibalism is a felony that can give the government a right to hold you in an international detainment facility for up to 40 years.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Andy Warhol said we will all be famous for fifteen minutes. My soccer coach molested me and the trial was televised, they obscured my face and voice because I was twelve at the time.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the rap singer say to the other rap singer? "You just got served. Here, read this subpoena and sign it, verifying your understanding of the document."

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what do you call a black man on the moon? Kid Cudi

thumb_up thumb_down -16

knock knock your nana had a cardiac arrest and thankfull dead now

thumb_up thumb_down -18

"Lack of sleep" is that like... Sleep deprivation?

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What was the worst part about the Holocaust? -When it ended

thumb_up thumb_down -40

A bear walks into a bar and says to the barman "I'll have a pint of................ beer please." The barman says "why the big pause?"

thumb_up thumb_down -110

Once upon a time, there was a gorilla who found Suzie. Suzie was mauled because she had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +127

Part 1 - Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms! Part 2 - Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzy!

thumb_up thumb_down +127

Why is the black guy unable to support his family? He's 3 years old.

thumb_up thumb_down +77

Why did the little girl cry when the x-ray showed her mom had a tumor? It was benign.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

who broke the little boys window? his abductor/rapist.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What came first: the chicken or the egg? God.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a white person on a leash? A toddler.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the black man go to school? So he could graduate with a degree and persue his life in medicine. He later goes on to get his P.H.D. He now supports his healthy family of 5 and living in Idaho, the state of the potato. He has a job as a doctor and is making more than $2M a year. Ha, didn't expect that now did ya.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the rabbit say to the frog? If you think the rabbit said anything, you need to see a psychiatrist.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What is Michael Bay's favorite fruit? Melon

thumb_up thumb_down -55

knock knock! fu ck off i'm a shift worker trying to sleep

thumb_up thumb_down -71

What's white on the top and black on the bottom? Society.

thumb_up thumb_down -161

What is the difference between you and I? I obviously have a life aas you don't because you are still reading these stupid jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops