Why did the pasta not taste good? Because your mom made it.

you ever put a vibrating phone on your b a l l s ???

what did the black guy say to the other black guy? good morning

What has two thumbs and cancer? This guy.

A batch of muffins is cooking in the oven, one muffin says to the others "it's hot in here!" the other muffins don't respond because they're muffins. He's the only of his kind.

How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Watermelons don't have feet.

Two gay guys hosted a barbecue. The music and food was great. Everyone had a good time.

What did Brielle say when she fell off the swing? Ow.

How do you starve a black man? You don't feed him.

matt shut up

What's black and buried in my backyard? An African American, I'm a member of the Ku Klux Klan

What did the girl say to her tits? I wanna suck u.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding it in your nose.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra

Why did the plane crash into a mountain? Because a Banana was flying it, and Bananas can't fly planes.

roses are red, voilets are creepy, i can beat you in call of duty

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

a mom tell her kid not to play with knives ten years later tells her kid not to play with knives and the kid asks y and the mom says because ur older brother killed his father and himself playing with knives so the kid said mom i promise i wont do that then kils his mom and himself

Why was the fish disappointed with his grades? They were all below C-level!

126

Why couldn't Michael ask out Mary? Because Mary had been dead for dead for 10 years.

A bear walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender knows that bears can't talk and realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and rolls over to tell his wife about the dream. She hears the joke, but turns away from him and pretends to be asleep. Then the bartender begins to cry. His marriage is in shambles.

Q: Why did the man take a shower? A: because he was dirty.

The prefix "con" means bad. The prefix "pro" means good. So what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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