What do you call a boy with no arms or legs? Chris

Why does Santa Claus not have children? Because he only comes once a year.

What's harder than a rock? The dead baby in my freezer.

roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

A man walked into a bar 2 hours later he died from drinking and driving

Why'd the chicken cross the road? It was hit by an oncoming motorist in a busy intersection.

What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? Doormat.

How do you scare Chris Ferguson? No one knows, he always has a pokerface on.

What do you call a baby with no arms nor legs? An infant lacking limbs.

Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

Q : Who is the most famous celebrity, Lady Gaga or Justin Bieber? A : Neither, because they are just fads.

What do you call a dolphin on a unicycle? You need medical help

whats red and and smells like blue paint red paint

How do you starve a blonde? You tie them up and deprive them of any food.

7am, waking up in the morning Gotta be fresh, gotta go downstairs Gotta have my bowl, gotta have cereal Seein’ everything, the time is goin’ Tickin’ on and on, everybody’s rushin’ Gotta get down to the bus stop Gotta catch my bus, I see my friends (My friends) Kickin’ in the front seat Sittin’ in the back seat Gotta make my mind up Which seat can I take? It’s Friday, Friday Gotta get down on Friday REBECCA BLACK FTW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hi im paul ! im an alien :D tyuioyt5rtyuikfuhgdehjdhfghjhgfjjhfjfjdjdjd i pe out of my finger :D

How does a cow does a cow do an evil laugh? Mooooooohahahahaha

What did the hammer say to the drill? Nothing, they don't talk stupid.

Why did the farmer go to the market? Because his butt was on fire!

A duck walked up to the lemonade stand And he said to the man running the stand: QUACK!

So what do you guys wanna do?? Anything, I still have cancer..

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Why did the man name his boy "Sue?" He had bad eyesight and thought it was a girl.

Why wasn't the turkey hungry on thanksgiving? Because it was dead!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...