A Mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who's driving? The black guy because the Mexicans was recently aressted for a dwi and had his repealed. But lately he has worked towards cleaning his life up. They were actually driving to an AA meeting.

Why didnt the chicken cross the road? -Its a chicken you dumb shit.

Your mom is so ugly that she decided to work as a prostitute and she died a virgin.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

A man walks into a bar. I don't know what happened next because I was waiting outside for my friend.

why did the chicken cross the road? i don;t know, that's why i was asking you

vagina, hehehehehehehe

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It was dead.

How do you stop the unstoppable You dont

Why could the girl climb out of the pool? She drowned

Loading....please wait.

Your mama so fat she is physically larger than other people.

Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

you: guess what somebody: what? you: you have cancer

WNBA

What's another word for a priest? Rapist

what do you call a animal with 3 horns. a triceratops

How do you wake up Lady GAGA? A sludge hammer!

Q.What happens when you win a trophy? A. You don't, there is always someone better than you.

if life gives you lemonnde your probally halusinating

there's 4 men, a rabbi, a priest, a monk, and a captain. they all go on the captain's ship for a cruise with a couple hundred people. this was during the cold war, and the ship was mistaken for a war ship, and the russians missled it. the monk says: "we have to get everyone off the ship!" the rabbit say: "NO! the women and children need to get off first! And we should also hail to Satan!" the Captain says: "OMG! It's a talking Rabbit!" the priest then stops the rabbit to death!" the rabbi says: "The rabbit is right! But just the children!" The Captain says: "Screw the children! this ship is going to Hell, we have talking animals saying we should worship the devil!" the priest says: "Do you think we have time" the monk, the rabbi, and the captain stare and beat him to death.... "Well, he was already going to Hell" the Monk says. But during this entire time the ship has been sinking and another missle blows up the ship. Everyone dies, except for Sean Conery...and Chuck Norris.

Your mother is so fat, when she dives into a pool, the on duty life guard blows his whistle to get her attention. He then proceeds to tell her about the dangers of diving into a pool with the depth of 5ft or less and asks her not to continue her antics. She is not pleased but decides it is best to follow the rules.

What is worse than using the toilet and then realising there's no toilet paper? A racially motivated massacre.

How many Weasleys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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