What's yellow and highly dangerous? Shark-infested banana pudding.

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Doesn't matter, he's not coming

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Why was the baby ant confused? Because his uncles were ants

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why couldn't the one armed man juggle because it was snowing outside and his one room flat was to small

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Wanna hear a funny joke? Look at the last joke.

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if x marks the spot, what does y do? y does the laundry.

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How did the fat man avoid getting dehydrated? Fat men don't excersise and therefore cannot become dehydrated.

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away. What about the vampires?

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kevin kim

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A bear walks into a bar and kills every one

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Why did the lion go to the doctor? He was hungry for man flesh. -John R-

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What did the fat girl say to her friend? I'm fat.

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I'm so hot my father calls me son.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin Holy shit a talking muffin

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It's Adam and Eve, not Steve and Eve!

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Why did the little girl fail her test? Because she had mental retardation.

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Why didn't the black man drink out of the white water fountain? Because he wasn't thirsty.

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An American man stopped me the other day and asked for the time, I looked at my watch and said: 5 o'clock.

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Where did Ellen go after the explosion? Everywhere

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The answer: He is dead! (read it throughout so you cant go wrong) Question: So why cant a man in Italia marry his widows sister? Moral: Had yet to read one like this one...

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Me: I have a great knock knock joke but you have to start it off. You: Knock knock Me: who's there? You: silence as the person is confused as what's going on

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Q: What do you get when you mix a joke with a rhetorical question?

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Knock knock. Who's there? Pete. I'm here to tell you that your entire family just died in a car accident.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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