how do you drown a blonde? strategically place a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a swimming pool (or just a regular sticker because, quite honestly, they won't be able to tell the difference as the water fills their lungs)

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How do you make a burns victim cry? You show them a mirror.

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Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 is a serial killer.

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a man walked into a bar.... when i say bar i mean a metal pole, the man suffered from concussion

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Whats the best part about 23 year olds? Theres 20 of them

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Why did 0 dislike 1? Because 1 made 0 feel like he was nothing

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What has two legs and is red all over? Half a cat

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Did you hear about the new pirate movie? It was rated PG-13.

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Whats The Difference Between A Baby And A Watermelon ? You Can Throw One In The Air And Hit It With A Bat , And The Other Ones A Watermelon

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Jingle bells Batman smells WHERE IS SHE??!!?!?!?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue this poem sucks, GET OVER IT -brett

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didnt she get back up? She had no friends.

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What do you get when you mix a panda,oklahoma,and a handle? The oklahoma panhandle.

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Q: What happened when Bob the Super-mega-ultra man, in his hurry to return an item that was objectively proven to be hazardous to physically normal people, banged his head very hard against a wall of a random building that was located on his route of travel? A: He recieved a concussion and had to coalesce in bed for a long time in order to return back to his regular style of living. Bob was merely a nominal 'Super-mega-ultra' man. He gets hurt practically as easily as anyone else.

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A Black Guy, A Mexican, A White guy, an Indian guy, Santa Clause and The Easter Bunny Jump off a 500 foot cliff. Which one dies? The all do. But Santa dies first because of his weight and mass.

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What sound does a baby make in a blender? Idk, i was too busy masturbating to hear.

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what do you do if you get in a car wreck with a black man get out of your vehicle and exchange insurance information

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A choir boy is hit by a car outside church. Someone runs to him and says "shall I fetch the priest?" The boy starts to mumble something but quickly loses consciousness, and later dies after 16 hours in ICU.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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What's worse than doing the dishes with long sleeves? Finding out your girlfriend's been cheating on you.

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After filling her car up with gas, a woman leaves the gas station with the pump still attached to her car. Why did this happen, you ask? It was a silly mistake anyone could have made.

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Why doe this filthy bitch take big dildos inside himself? Because he is gay.

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Why did the little girl stop going to dance class? She broke both of her legs in a terrible train accident

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Knock knock Get off my porch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops