A man walked into a bar, was surprised to find his wife with another man, and had a heart attack.

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why did helen cellars dog runway. you would to if ur name was ujujujujjujujujujujj

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knock knock who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill Smith, we went to high school together. Oh hey Bill, come on in.

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Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your penis tastes like shit.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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there's 4 men, a rabbi, a priest, a monk, and a captain. they all go on the captain's ship for a cruise with a couple hundred people. this was during the cold war, and the ship was mistaken for a war ship, and the russians missled it. the monk says: "we have to get everyone off the ship!" the rabbit say: "NO! the women and children need to get off first! And we should also hail to Satan!" the Captain says: "OMG! It's a talking Rabbit!" the priest then stops the rabbit to death!" the rabbi says: "The rabbit is right! But just the children!" The Captain says: "Screw the children! this ship is going to Hell, we have talking animals saying we should worship the devil!" the priest says: "Do you think we have time" the monk, the rabbi, and the captain stare and beat him to death.... "Well, he was already going to Hell" the Monk says. But during this entire time the ship has been sinking and another missle blows up the ship. Everyone dies, except for Sean Conery...and Chuck Norris.

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q

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What do you call 10 black people on the moon? A problem What do you call 1000 black people on the moon? A problem What do you call the population of black people on the moon? A huge problem

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What do you call a black man in an envelope? A tiny black man

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why did the lesbians shop at modell's? because they thought the store had reasonable prices and considerable discounts

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What is big, white, and hurts when it falls from the sky? A FRIDGE

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Q: What is wrong on many different levels? A: Rape on an elevator.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm about to kill you Don't scream, here's a lollipop

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What's worse than finding a bone in your boneless chicken meal? Going home to find your entire family brutally murdered.

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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson? I thought you were dead.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall?

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what did the mom with cancer get for christmas? radiation poisoning

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the same wolf that had devoured the chickens' chicks singlehandedly was chasing it.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I suck at Poetry, show me your Tits.

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Al Kida and Terry Wrist walk out of jail.

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what did the farmer say to the cowgirl that made her positive that she had a weird laugh? you have a weird laugh.

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What's worse than being the last man on earth with thousands of women to please? Realizing that you are gay and there are no men left.

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What did the snow flake which could talk say to the other snow flake which could talk None of us are the same.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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