Why didn't the cheese buy a house plant? Cheese is nonliving and therefore cannot earn money, thus preventing cheese from buying houseplants.

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When is a tree not a tree? When it's a rock.

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Why did the farmer go to the market? Because his butt was on fire!

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Is your friend gay? Yeah, duh, of course he's happy.

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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My Joke Is The Persons Below Me I I V

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Why did the boy scream? Because his girlfriend poked him in the butthole, which he was not expecting. Thus surprising him.

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Why do innocent boys have wet dreams? Cause Jesus sucks.

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Why is a jewish man so tall? Genetics

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Have you ever seen the episode of the powerpuff girls where they save the day?

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

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Women's rights

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What do you call the alarm system in a failing inner-city school? A dumbbell!

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That's a rhetorical question chickens don't cross roads!

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Why do the cangaroos are weird? cause they have testicles in front and penis back, is real!

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all muslims get the fuck out of britain you fucks

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What did Aaron Pfeifer say to Zach Faller ? Yee

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What's the difference between a cow and a purple sweater? They're both purple Besides the cow

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What do you call a man who rides on unicorns? A liar. Unicorns don't exist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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A very unskillful basketball team enters a basketball tournament. They had little chance of winning and concluded with a loss.

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Did you hear about the black guy who got into college? Actually, there are nearly 10,00 African Americans who get accepted into college every year. This specific black male is notable because of his stellar grades and his activity in his community.

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Knock Knock.

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I like my women like I like my coffee, without a dick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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