Roses are red Violets are blue I hate sex Especially with you

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What's funnier than an knock knock joke???? Dancing narwhals pooping talking soup

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How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

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Q. Whats the easiest way to end world hunger? A. Nuke Africa.

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What is the difference between a car and dead babies? The car is legally obtainable by law and can run on gasoline, when dead babies are nonliving humans, and the owner of which would most likely be sent to jail.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have AD i love squirrels

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Neither has Stevie Wonder

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One day I was hungry. I ate. I wasn't hungry anymore. Penis.

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A homosexual black man and a 13 year old child are in the shower at the local gym. The black man says to the boy "you dropped your soap, why don't you pick it up?" The boy promptly thanks the black man, picks up his soap and continues to shower.

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Did you hear about the blonde that went to college? She got a degree.

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Worst joke ever

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What's black and white and red all over? A mime that got hit by a train

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What's worse than loosing your pen? Getting raped by a pedophile.

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A man is so drunk that the alcohol has a biphasic effect on the body, meaning that its effects change over time. Initially, alcohol typically produces feelings of relaxation and cheerfulness. Increased consumption, however, can lead to dehydration, coordination problems, blurred vision, and a great number of health, medical, and social issues and other drinking problems caused by alcoholism. As articulated above, excessive alcohol consumption can lead to drunkenness. One of the short term effects of intoxication is the lowering of an individual's inhibitions. As a consequence, when people are intoxicated they frequently do things they normally would not do while sober, often ignoring legal, ethical, social, and moral or religious norms. While blurred vision, slurred speech, dehydration, and coordination can be labeled as "alcohol short term effects," other health problems such as alcohol related heart disease, liver disease, and cancer, on the other hand, can be labeled as long term effects of alcohol abuse and alcoholism. This, however brief, is an overview of the effects of alcohol. What remains to be discussed, however, is what Paul Harvey calls "the rest of the story." Essentially, "the rest of the story" is a more detailed analysis of how excessive alcohol affects an individual's life and the lives of those around him or her when the person becomes an alcoholic and suffers from alcoholism. Perhaps the most logical way to discuss this complex topic is to focus first on the classic alcoholic behaviors and effects of alcohol in the four states of alcoholism; then examine some of the "social effects" of alcohol and alcoholism and finally, discuss the medical conditions, health issues, and drinking problems that are caused directly or indirectly by alcoholism.

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What's worse than cancer? Death.

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Why is it bees travel in formation, one side is longer than the other? ... There are more bees on one side

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What do you call a man or woman who has sex, records it on video, and sells the recordings for money? A porn star.

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what do you call a cow with no legs? ground BEEF!!!!

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Your mom is so fat that she has to wear large clothing.

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Man walks in the bar then buys a drink

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What do you call a dead prostitute? - You (or friends name) in 10 years

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Mcfly: Doc! i have to tell you about the future! Doc: Ok.

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A man walks into a pet store. He then says "This isn't the bar" and leaves.

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Why was the bear rushing home after work? Because he was late for dinner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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