how do you make the president cry ?? shoot his family !!

How do you murder a blonde? You drop a bull dozer on her filled with 2 bulls, 100 wasps and a rabbit squirrel.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Neither has Stevie Wonder

What do you get when you put white cheese in a blender and turn it on? White cheese.

whats 2+2? 4

Q) Whats wet fishy and gets caught by fishermen? A) fish.

A baby elephant steps on a lego. First thought, auch, huh ?! Actually, the lego was fine with it and so was the baby elephant. Now they're married and are expecting a baby legophant.

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? They can't change anything.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Just kidding, it got hit by a car on the way to the other side.

Follow the Yellow brick road, follow the yellow brick road........except it's not yellow.

what does the black guy order for a drink at the bar. kool aid

So a bunch of blondes are in a group and a murder comes by and sais, "if you want to live, answer a question right." so the blondes pick there smartest on. the first question is, what is 9+4... the blonde answers five, the crowd goes "give her another chance giver her another chance, same thing happens, she gets it wrong and the crowd goes "give her another chance, give her another chance." the murderer sais "ok fine this is your final guess, what is 2+2" the blonde goes "uuhhhhhh... 4?" And the whole crowd goes "give her another chance give her another chance

Chuck Norris doesn't swim... He never learned

What's awkward? Your phone going off at a funeral What's more awkward than that? Your ringtone is Highway to Hell

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Chickens like to wander around.

What do Elephants never forget? 9/11

What did the bungee jumper say to his wife? Honey, I'm going bungee jumping today.

What is worse than the Haulocost? Running across Africa with KFC

Are you Drew?

Win and Beau have no friends

Q: What's worse than the holocaust. A: Me not getting my Christmas presents.

What do you call a black man with no education? An unfortunate outcome of our meritocratic society.

guy 1: hey, i got a new dog. isn't he cute? guy 2: i just lit him on fire

Q: what do you call a bunch of dead accountants? A: the holacost.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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