how do make you a child cry? break his fingers

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Why did the man have a hole in his head? He was shot.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a toaster. A lot of things.

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Why didnt the chicken cross the road? -Its a chicken you dumb shit.

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When Nicki Minaj wrote her song "Stupid Hoe" she was sublimminally talking about her self.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had escaped from a KFC slaughterhouse, and proceeded forward to avoid getting caught. However, the chicken did not consider the childhood lectures off his parents about crossing the road safely, and got ran over by a black Golf GTI, and died instantly.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your mom is dead And your dad is too

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An Ethiopian field worker goes into work one day and finds out he was fired. Agriculture in Ethiopia is bad because it doesn't rain much.

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Miley Cyrus is Twerk Queen

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Police say's 'have you been drinking' and you reply back saying 'YES' then the police brings out the blower and you blow, it says on it that you are fine, but then the cops ask you 'what did you drink' and you just say 'well i drank juice for breakfast then had some water, tea, coffee' the cops get really angry but before he says anything you say that ' I AM MUSLIM'

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What do you get when you put a cat in a Xerox machine? A copycat.

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person 1: Did you hear about the black man that went to college? Person 2: no i haven't Person 1: either have I What's ironic is that they are both black

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Chinese food tastes so oriental sometimes, sort of like asian food

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what is a model plus a poop plus a rhino plus a flamingo a peice of floob split in half or a shelby koon

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It was dead.

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What do you call a clock with no hands? Broken.

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Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

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What's Pink And Fluffy? Pink Fluff.

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Why did the tree get mad at the bush? It didn't. Bushes are inanimate objects, and so are trees.

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What did timmy fall off the swings? He had no arms

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What did the teacher say to the student? Get in the closet

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Where did the moon get its degree? Unfortunately, they haven't installed any colleges for planetary satellites yet.

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Q: What did the nomad get for christmas? A: Most likely nothing because he lives in the middle of nowhere where no stores exist. If anything, he got a sandstorm.

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What happens when you lose your fish? It dies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops