When is a door not a door? Never. a door is always a door. it cannot be anything else.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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whats the difference between colby and a high schooler? Colby hasn't matured yet

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A priest, a midget, and the toothfairy walk into a bar. Barack Obama.

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Why did the girl jump of the control tower??? She didnt I lied.

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Why is Roenz Gay? He isnt.

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Why were there teeth marks in the guys arm? He bit himself

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What is faster than a black guy stealing a TV? His brother with a DVR

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's only a joke. It's not that, my wife and son were just killed in a drunk driving accident.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the bottom of a pit? Whatever his parents named him.

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What do you get when you cross North Korea and the boston marathon? BOMBS! :(

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Whats bloody and wrinkly? Your nans fanny

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What has wheels and flies? An Airplane

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cool story bro. tell it again. tell it at a party.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They were baked until the baker them until they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why was the kindergarten teacher crying? a child had just choked to death

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How tall is the grass in Germany? ZIS HIGH! *put hand about an inch and half off the ground* I mow it about every ozher week

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what is the difference between coke and pepsi? -they are competing soft drinks made by different brands

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Mark Twain, Jesus, and Bill Gates are sitting at a bar. Someone messed with the space time continuum again.

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When life gives you melons, youre probably dyslexic.

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How did the magician make it look like there are 2 books on the table? By putting 2 books on the table

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Why did the man shoot himself Because he was black

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What do you call a person with no legs and an eyepatch? Names.

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Got no dick? Then you're probably a girl.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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