Four blonds are driving to Disney World when they come across a sign that says Disney World left... So they take the left and enjoy themselves at the place many considered the most wonderful place in the world.

whats the difference between chuck norris and a normal human being? nothing

<=-):[ J1MMY | Dubstep Maniacs Crew 4 Life ]:(-=>

Q: How does a chicken get to work? A: A chicken does not go to work. Chickens can not legally be employed for any position in any country as they are chickens, are not human, and do not posses any prerequisites required to be hired for any existing employable position.

What's the difference between a muffin and a scone? One's a muffin.

What do you call a man who is walking into walls and poles? A blind man who really needs your help.

What requires lots of rubbing, dirty pictures, and leaves you happy for a little bit, but then you realize you're sad and lonely? A minimum wage job where you clean pictures.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Segregation

Did you hear about the cannibal who had a wife and ate kids?

Why couldn't the unicorn fly? It was a horse.

why did the girl like d1ck? because d1ck was a nice boy

What is the result of a couples' feud? 96.

Roses are tits, Violets are tits, I love tits. Tits.

What's the square root of 69? 8.3

What's the difference between an ostridge? It can neither fly.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

If your South American in the kitchen, what are you in the bathroom? European ( your a pee an)

two guys walk into a bar. the third guy ducks

-What do you call the brown spots in your yard? Dog shit.

Women's sports.

What do dogs and cats have in common? They eat dog food, accept for the cat.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocost

Q: What's white, black, and red all over? A: The yellow brick road

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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