Your mom was diagnosed with aids. Her prognosis was 6 months....clearly this joke is about the Holocaust.

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Have you heard the one about the three tailed salamander that fell off a bridge? I haven't either.

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SIMPLE EQUATION: John has 32 chocolate bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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What do you call a black guy, a white guy, a mexican guy, and a chinese guy jumping out of a plane? Skydivers.

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What's brown and smells like poop? A monkey.

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A doctor, a farmer, and a blonde walk into a bar. The doctor orders red wine because he knows it's good for the heart. The farmer orders a Piña Colada because he likes fruit. The two men wait eagerly to what the blonde is about to order. The blonde opens her purse and says "Damn it, I can't find my credit card." Suddenly, a handsome young gentleman walks up to her says "Don't worry miss, I'll buy a drink for you. What are you having?" The blonde looks up and says "Don't worry? I just lost my credit card!" In a fit a of anger, the blonde storms out the bar and doesn't order anything.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a T-Rex? There are certainly innumerable differences, but, in general, humans are vertebrates belonging to the Mammalia class, chiefly a member of the species Homo sapiens; dinosaurs are chiefly terrestrial, herbivorous or carnivorous reptiles from the extinct orders Saurischia and Ornithischia.

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whats green and has wheels? grass i lied about the wheels

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What's the difference between an alcoholic and a drug dealer? An alcoholic is an extremely corrupted, and unhealthy living person. Though so is a drug dealer... They are both very harmful situations in many ways.

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Why did the girl jump? Because she was on a trampoline.

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knock knock who's there? no one, but I appreciate the fact you asked.

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Do you know what's not right? Left.

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What's the difference between an ostridge? It can neither fly.

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why did the girl like d1ck? because d1ck was a nice boy

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Nicolas Cage's acting.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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Roses are tits, Violets are tits, I love tits. Tits.

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How did the cat die of indigestion? Indigestion

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Why Are Parking Lines White? - So You Can See Them..

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What's worse than finding a bone in your boneless chicken meal? Going home to find your entire family brutally murdered.

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Have you seen the movie "Constipation?" No. It hasn't come out yet! Of course there is no such movie in production and no plans for such a movie exist.

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Trees are like friends. They both fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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Q: How does a chicken get to work? A: A chicken does not go to work. Chickens can not legally be employed for any position in any country as they are chickens, are not human, and do not posses any prerequisites required to be hired for any existing employable position.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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