Why is a blonde a door knob... Because everybody gets a turn

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roses are red i have a phone nobody texts me forever alonee lol

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Why could the red-haired boy sing higher notes than the blonde-haired boy? He was castrated at birth.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Why does it matter, they can't chuck wood in the first place.

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? An ambulance.

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You know what big feet mean? Big socks

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Loading....please wait.

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I spilled Spot Remover on my dog. Now he is blind and has chemical burns all over his body.

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Good luck on your finals everyone!

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Do you know what's not right? Left.

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Hey, look under there! Under what?

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What do you call a black airman? A pilot!

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The answer: He is dead! (read it throughout so you cant go wrong) Question: So why cant a man in Italia marry his widows sister? Moral: Had yet to read one like this one...

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How is butter and your mom similar? They both consist of much fat.

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What did the man say halfway through his sponsored trek across the Sahara desert? Well this was a dumb idea

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So two cannibals are eating a clown. Cannibal one: Does this taste funny to you? Cannibal two: Considering that this man was a clown he must have been in poverty so he resulted to being an alcoholic and maybe over dosed on over the counter drugs. Cannibal one: Thank you for that reasonable answer.

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What is the difference between a rock and a pencil? Your Mom.

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A child rides by his mother on his bicycle and says "Look Mom, no hands!" The child doesn't come back, and night falls but he has yet to come home. His mother calls the police and a search begins 2 days later. He is never found is presumed dead.

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There was this guy who walked in the bar with one shoe. The bartender asks what happened. The man said the shoe didn't fit. So the bartender ask where is the other shoe. The man said he threw it away. The bartender looks in the trashcan and sure enough he sees his other shoe. The bartender says "This is the same size as your other shoe. Why are you wearing one shoe?" The man says "I'm just playing a prank on you. There's a hidden camera over there and over there. Is it okay if I can put you on YouTube?" and the bartender says "No."

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What's worse than a 15 year old getting hit by a car? Adam Johnson

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If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, how many does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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Chuck Norris once went skydiving. his parachute did not deploy. where he landed is now known as the grand canyon

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What's the difference between a plum and a bunny? They're both purple. Except the bunny.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the other birds had taken hostage the chickens family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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