Whats red and smells like cherries? Cherries

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

whats better than 69? doing it with jarads mum!!

Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I'm colorblind

I got a dig bick. You that read wrong, You read that wrong too.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, Mitchell ate it before it could do so.

DAMMIT MY IPHONE IS IN REPAIR AND I CANT GET THE APP!!!!!!!

No, but it was a nice chance to pretend to, that was the scheme part I might have mentioned, people never figure out that you are fucking them over at the present, if you tell them you fucked them off in the past, they start thinking backwards, often ignoring those tiny details straight in front of them. Listen, call me a bit paranoid, but who the hell is Septimus and AzureDragon or whatever the fuck his little geek name was?

Whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? One is blonde and one is brunette.

A priest and a rabbi walk into a strip club. They then realised that they are religious leaders and set an example for their respective religious communities and shouldn't be in a strip club and leave.

So a man enters a local paper's pun contest. He enters ten puns in hopes that one of them would win. But unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names...

your mamas so fat her weight is 3.14 without the decimal

Does this napkin chloroform?

What's funnier than an knock knock joke???? Dancing narwhals pooping talking soup

What's brown and sticky? ...A stick.

Why couldn't Jenny speak right? Cause she had autism.

If you can't read this, you should think about optical enhancement surgery. If you can, however, you just wasted 5 seconds of your life doing so.

How did Pikachu jump off of a 100 story building and survive? He's not real

Six Jews get on a train. They all safely arrive at their locations.

What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, she's already been told twice.

69

Whats better than sitting here writing anti jokes? Sitting in ENGLISH and writing anti jokes. Shoutout to Link Deas

Zach Barlow

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...