They say the human body is comprised of 70% water, it's more like... 60% because I'm dehydrated if know what I'm saying... I should really drink some water.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman...

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Knock Knock Who's there? ImBrewn

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What eats McDonalds for breakfast, lunch and dinner, annoys everyone around them, and could care less about anyone but themselves? The population of the United States.

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL

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Why does Santa Claus not have children? Because he only comes once a year.

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how do you drown a blonde? strategically place a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a swimming pool (or just a regular sticker because, quite honestly, they won't be able to tell the difference as the water fills their lungs)

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what did the little boy say to little girl? I shit bricks.

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3 penguins meet each other in penguin #1's backyard for a pool party. The first penguin climbs up the steps of the water slide gets to the top, looks around and then slides down the slide *SPLASH* The second penguin climbs up the steps, looks around then slides down the slide *SPLASH* The third penguin hastily climbs the steps and slides down the slide radio -Soulbroker

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what do you do if you get in a car wreck with a black man get out of your vehicle and exchange insurance information

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What's are the screams and terror when midnight hits? Vannlia Ice's face.

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Your maternal figure contains so many Triglycerides, her belt size is greater than or equal to the circumference of the Earth.

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A woman walked into the doctors office with a black eye. The doctor asked: How did you get that? The woman said: I fell.

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Q: Why do so many people write "So a man walked into a bar" A: Because they lack the intellect to think of something creative, and still other peoples material.

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My life :(

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Why did the little girl stop going to dance class? She broke both of her legs in a terrible train accident

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how did the thirteen year old girl get pregnant? she was raped.

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two blondes walk into a bar... to get to the other side

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why did the man tell a joke? to make people laugh

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who is awesome? no one...

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a man walked into a bar.... when i say bar i mean a metal pole, the man suffered from concussion

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what is worse than bitting into your apple and finding a worm? 9/11

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how long does it take a black woman to shit? 3 to 5 minutes depending on the food she ingested earlier that day

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One morning a man was frustrated at the dining table. His wife ask "What's wrong?". He says "I can't fit this stupid puzzle pieces together." His wife asks "What's it a picture of?" The man says "A rooster" The wife says "Honey, put the cornflakes back in the cereal box." The man says "no".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops