Why was the black guy mad at the white guy? Duh, cause the black guy slapped the white guy.

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What did the cashier say to the customer? You're total is $27.95

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so there are 3 people who have heard of this magical cliff; theyre names are harry, dick, and joe. how the cliff works is that when you jump off you turn into whatever you say as you jump. first harry jumps off and yells plane, he turns into a plane and flys off. next dick jumps off and yells bird he turns into a bird and flys off. finally joe steps up to the cliff as he was walking he trips and falls as hes falling he yells HARRY DICK he than hits the ground and dies. everyone mourned for such a well respected individual.

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Why does dan leave Amy? Because dan is in another relationship and did not want to be unlawful to Amy.

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A man with Alzheimers favorite thing to read is the first page of the antijoke book

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why did the man tell a joke? to make people laugh

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How does a cow does a cow do an evil laugh? Mooooooohahahahaha

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Two aspies don't walk into a bar.

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Your mama's teeth are so yellow... She should think about scheduling an appointment at a local dentist's office.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? He was on his way home from work and saw some youths loitering on the street corner and thought it best to avoid them and therefore any possible confrontation. He would also appreciate it if you would call him something along the lines of Bravery impaired instead of a chicken as he finds it offensive and doesn't fully understand the avian reference to his lack of confidence.

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Knock Knock Who's there I have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock

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how many gay guys does it take to fix a blender? baby oil!

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How do you starve a blonde? You tie them up and deprive them of any food.

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One day i had to piss. I went to the bathroom.

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How did the child cross the road? He couldn't his legs had been lost in an awful car accident that had killed his whole family.

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women's rights

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What's black and white and red all over? A nazi flag

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

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What did the deaf person say to the comedian? ... ... ... ... I'm sorry, did you say something?

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A man walks into a bar and is promptly escorted out because it is a bar for cats only.

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What do a Jew and a Vegan have in common? They both won't eat pork products.

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A man walked into a bar 2 hours later he died from drinking and driving

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Q: What were Peter's emotions after he bought his $2 million house? A: None, in fact he has no home, family and anyone to help him. his leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

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How many black people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? There are many circumstances that could affect the outcome of the situation. One of them is whether or not the given people have or will soon obtain a ladder. In this case, the lightbulb could take more time than needed to be screwed in and effectively changed. Another key factor in the situation is the number of people. If there are enough people to reach the ceiling without a ladder, the lightbulb could be screwed in sooner or later than asked by the owner of the facility in which the lightbulb socket is installed. Finally, the height of the persons given is a crucial point in this situation. The people may be tall, thus allowing there to be fewer people needed. The people could be short and need a greater number of people than if the people were, perhaps, a bit taller. All in all, I'd say about 1-2.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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