A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd probably pay in cash.

What's the difference between a dead baby and a man? One's tall the other's not

What do you call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

Two drums and a cymbol fall off a cliff... ba bum BUM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA it used to be ba dum ching but im so funny that i changed it to ba dum bum. credit to Alex H

Once upon a time there were seven dwarfs. They were named Steven, Jason, John, Peter and Alfred.

Jackson's dad told him to "play in the traffic".

Why are Asians so smart? Because they study

Sharks have teeth, I have teeth, Therefore i am a cat.

Did the chicken cross the road? No because it was in a fenced in area like all farm animals should be

why was the man's arm bleeding? Because he just got shot in the arm...

Roses are red, violets are blue God made me beautiful, how about you?

So a Jew an Asian and a gay guy all walk into a bar... ...I lied. It was an oven.

Knock, Knock Who's there? No one OK???? BYE, BYE U still there? Yeah Umm . . . ?

Does this napkin chloroform?

Hey guys wanna here a joke? Never mind it was a gay joke but f**k it.

Why did the Mexican put away the Marijuana? Because he was a Police Officer

What is worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

What is another word for a woman that ends in unt. Aunt.

What do you call a dead prostitute? - You (or friends name) in 10 years

knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

Knock knock Come in No you supposed to say who's there Oh, who's there? Jennifer Come in No, you supposed to say Jennifer who Oh, Jennifer who? Forget it

Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

What does a snake and a dog have in common? They are both reptiles but except the dog.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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