A bear walked into a bar, unfortunately there were no survivors.

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So a bunch of blondes are in a group and a murder comes by and sais, "if you want to live, answer a question right." so the blondes pick there smartest on. the first question is, what is 9+4... the blonde answers five, the crowd goes "give her another chance giver her another chance, same thing happens, she gets it wrong and the crowd goes "give her another chance, give her another chance." the murderer sais "ok fine this is your final guess, what is 2+2" the blonde goes "uuhhhhhh... 4?" And the whole crowd goes "give her another chance give her another chance

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what the difference between matthew and a retard? The retard can do math

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When life gives you oranges, hit kidswith 'em.

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Knock Knock Hows there Theres no time for this you have AIDS

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What happened to the prisoner who dropped the soap while in the shower with other men? Another prisoner picked up and gave it to him and finished showering and felt squeaky clean.

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What did the man do when he was tired Nothing he went to bed

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Knock knock. Who's there? Dr. Dr who? Dr Johnson. I'm afraid you have AIDS.

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Vagina jokes aren't funny. Period.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? God. God Who? ::Apocalypse follows::

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None, now stop hallutinating about wood chuck.

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Rabid squirrels attacked Blake's face as winged pickles perched on Phoebe's hair.

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What did the orphan get on his birthday? Cancer.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Coming home and discovering that your wife has drowned your kids in the bathtub

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Why did the black man not tip his waiter? Because she provided terrible service and was undeserving.

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what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer we're both lawyers

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Q. did u see Stevie wonders new house A. no me. neither did he

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What is red and does not cry? Half a baby.

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A horse walks into a bar and doesnt order a drink. Because he cant.

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Q: Why did you fall of that swing? A: Because I'm fat.

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What do you get if you cross a sheep and a kangeroo??? ... A sheep cannot be crossed with a kangaroo because the genes from sheep cannot work with genes from a kangaroo to produce hybrid sheegaroos or kangareeps.

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A young man spent his summer as an intern at a school. He eventually became a real estate agent but it was a pretty cool experience.

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What's Black white and red all over? Half a penguin

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What's the difference between my car and a pile of dead babies? You can't eat my car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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