Dear mom, I'm wearing skinny jeans. If I can't get them off, Neither can the rapist.

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Why is the black guy unable to support his family? He's 3 years old.

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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Why did Henry jump of a cliff? He was in deep depression.

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What is the difference between a cow and a pig? To get to the other side.

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Andy Warhol said we will all be famous for fifteen minutes. My soccer coach molested me and the trial was televised, they obscured my face and voice because I was twelve at the time.

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What did the young boy say to the adorable kitten? "Aww"

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Why was Thomas Jefferson chosen to write the Declaration of Independence? He was an educated man and seemed suitable for said job.

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What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? A disgusting halfbreed which prays daily for its own euthenasia...

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What do you call a man with no legs? Disabled.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Say eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? IT WAS DEAD.

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Jake: "Guys Apple's new phone is going to be curved." Bob: "Who makes curved phones?" Jake: "Apple."

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Q. Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A. Because he slipped on his moms three day old tampon.

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A bear walks into a bar and says to the barman "I'll have a pint of................ beer please." The barman says "why the big pause?"

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What's white on the top and black on the bottom? Society.

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Why did Landry hit the man with a metal pipe? Because he was a rapist and wanted to remove his virgin status.

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The prefix "con" means bad. The prefix "pro" means good. So what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

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whats round red and taste like candy? such a thing doesn't exist

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What came first: the chicken or the egg? God.

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Did you hear about the blond who went to college? She got her masters. became and environmental scientist, married a nice man, and had two wonderful children. After retiring at age 65, she spent the rest of her days living in a cozy beachside house.

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What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? Get it repaired.

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What stinks and comes out of someones mouth. Bad Breath

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Then help me understand Nero, people had the free and legal right to decide to be a part of our, or your society if you prefer, where has that option gone now? Where is the people that choose to believe in their own potential and in the one of their equals? Today we live in a society where its basically pop culture to dislike oneself, where it is considered narcissism to like oneself, and you know that we have both been affected, while those we considered allies before, have joined the same people that branded us evil.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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