A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

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Why was the fish disappointed with his grades? They were all below C-level!

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Once upon a time, there was a gorilla who found Suzie. Suzie was mauled because she had no arms

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What would be a good feature for this site? A search by keyword feature. (sorry...)

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You know what's funnier than 24? 25.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Oh, they were just nailing a notice of foreclosure to the door.

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matt shut up

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What did the young boy say to the adorable kitten? "Aww"

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Do you know what a lion really is? It's an over sized cat.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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A batch of muffins is cooking in the oven, one muffin says to the others "it's hot in here!" the other muffins don't respond because they're muffins. He's the only of his kind.

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas?

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whats round red and taste like candy? such a thing doesn't exist

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The prefix "con" means bad. The prefix "pro" means good. So what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

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How do you starve a black man? You don't feed him.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had to arms. Knock knock Who's there? Well clearly not Sally

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Andy Warhol said we will all be famous for fifteen minutes. My soccer coach molested me and the trial was televised, they obscured my face and voice because I was twelve at the time.

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Why did Justin Beiber cross the road? He didn't because he is still in the closet!

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Mitch

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What did Adam Sandler get for Christmas? Nothing, he is Jewish

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What did the guy with Alzheimer's say to his.... Wait, I forgot the joke

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What do you call a man with no legs? Disabled.

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What happened when Satan met God ? Nothing, because neither Satan nor God exist.

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shall i compare thee to a summers day, no, because thee are ugly, yay

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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