Q: what did the common cold say to the cough? A: you are SO annoying!

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whats round red and taste like candy? such a thing doesn't exist

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Why do latins like soccer so much? Because it's a very popular sport in the whole world.

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What does a black man, an Irishman, and a Jewish man all have in common? Male genitalia.

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Why couldn't the dog say anything to the cat? It was born deaf.

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Why did the young man visit the optometrist? Because when he went to put in his contacts earlier that morning, he dropped one on the carpet and couldn't find it and it was his last pair so he needed to go order new ones but it had been over a year since he had been to the optometrist so they make you come get your eyes checked before you make a new order to decide whether the lens strength should remain the same or be increased/decreased.

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What did the black guy said when he ate a pie? Nothing, he learned not to speak with a full mouth.

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What's worse than breaking your leg? Finding out that your family has died due to an infection causing all of them to perish in horrible deaths

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why do humans have gall bladders? I honestly don't know

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What's worse than finding a hair in your sandwitch? Finding a dead baby in your salad!

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How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

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And so the poster says to the apple ........ Your not my dog

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Cancer

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Why did the tractor run over the little boy? because he was in the way!

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Why couldn't Michael ask out Mary? Because Mary had been dead for dead for 10 years.

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If I said "This AntiJoke will get thumbs up" It will get thumbs up

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Q: Why did the man take a shower? A: because he was dirty.

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Why is the black guy unable to support his family? He's 3 years old.

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I dropped two snare drums and a cymbal down a hole earlier. They're probably broken now.

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roses are grey violets are grey i am color blind

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas?

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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matt shut up

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Q: What did the bartender say to the Arab as he was walking in? A: Nothing, the bomb had already killed them both.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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