What do you get when you put a cat in a Xerox machine? A copycat.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, how many does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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how many aliens does it take to change a light bulb? i wouldn't know, i have never seen one and there is the off chance that they don't even exist

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What do you call a group of jews hiding in an attic? Well, this sounds very similar to the events during World War II in which Anne Frank and various jewish refugees hid from the Nazis.

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Two guys are walking down the street. One asks the other "Nice weather today, huh?" And the other responds "It sure is," and they both continue on with their days.

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What's big, yellow and green? The sun, i was kidding about the green

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new girlfriend? Neither has he.

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What did the man say halfway through his sponsored trek across the Sahara desert? Well this was a dumb idea

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Give a man a fire and he will be warm for the rest of the night. Set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

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Why was Bootylatrice tardy for school? -She overslept.

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Q:If pigs ever played basketball, then what sound would they make? A:Oink-oink

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Why was danielle so fat? She can't help her bad genetics

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What did 0 say to 8? Nice belt

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 has been charged on 3 accounts of 2nd degrees murder and 6 fears for his life.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Child Protection Services. ...............

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Q: What is wrong on many different levels? A: Rape on an elevator.

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What do you call a Jew in Harlem? It depends on what his name is. I advise procuring a polite introduction from a mutual acquaintance.

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yo momma so fat that she's fat

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What is a panda bear? A bear with black and white fur.

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Silly Sally Dillydallied then lost her job to outsourcing.

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What swims in the ocean? Fish

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I have Alzheimer. What?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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