What's brown and sticky? Anal rape

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My dog has no nose! Then how does he smell? Terrible!

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No, luke. I am your father. damnit

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the hospital? A: The victim of a violent mob attack

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Hey! do you have any updog? Nothing much! you?

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Your mama's so fat she can't have children.

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Your mama so stupid. She tried to climb over a glass wall to see the other side

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What did the coach do to the player Coached the player

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You might be a Redneck...if your job requires you to work long hours out in the sun and you do not take advantage of sunscreen.

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A man and a dog were sitting on a hill, the dog says to the man "Nice weather we are having today isn't it?" The man then goes insane because dogs can't talk, then later commits suicide from depression caused by his wife leaving him.

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Bill: My brother died on 9/11 Steve: Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he in one of the towers? Bill: Both. Steve: Both? Bill: He was in one tower when the first plane hit, so he ran over to warn everybody in the other tower and while he was in the other tower, he died of AIDS. Steve: LOL Bill: Quit your laughing, Steve, and make sweet, sweet love to me! Steve: It would be my pleasure! (While Bill and Steve made sweet, sweet love on that park bench, little did they know that a hundred miles away in a beautiful Los Angeles home, actor Jeff Goldblum was making himself a turkey sandwich...not too much mayo...just the way he likes it.)

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Hitler: I said PASS THE JUICE! not GAS THE JEWS!

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What's black and twelve inches long? A Maglite.

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Dylan Hodge likes to lick his mums penis to sleep every night.

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Q: What's fat and smelly? Q: What's worse than Nikki Manaj? Q: What's the bane of everyone and everything's existence? A: Kim Kardashian

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What has 2 brown legs and 2 gray legs? An elephant with diarrhea.

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this sentence will not monkey banana pie

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What did the person do at the stop sign? Stop

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Why did the mother have a club in her hands covered with red liquid? She spilled her bloody murry while playing golf.

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Womens rights.

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What's the color of a retarde dogs hair? 69

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I saw a butterfly yesterday with no wings so I poured some red bull on it and BAM! it drowned.

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Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

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what do you call a mixbreed of a bull dog and a shitzu? a sharpei

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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