Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

What do you call a women in the kitchen? A caterer

When does George Harrison take a shit? In the morning

When life gives you lemons you get sugar and water and make some good lemonaide.

How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Hit him with an ax

There was an Irishman, an American and a French man standing at a bar. They all ordered drinks and struck up conversation with each other about what they do for a living and their families. They all go home to their partners and have a peaceful nights sleep.

Student: This guy is bothering me! Teacher: And you expect me to do something about it?

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Nothing really

Whats funnier than a Dead Baby in a bathtub? Nothing Thats as good as it gets!

Roses are red my name is Dave this poem makes no sense, micorwave

What's 1+1 2, dumbass...

what has 4 legs but can't walk? a paralyzed dog

Chicken

What did the Ocean say to the Sky? Nothing, it just waved.

What did the Catholic Priest say to Chris Hanson? Nothing. He attempted to flea, and was quickly taken down by law enforcement. He was then detained and processed and charged with Intent to commit statutory rape with a minor under the age of 14. He's still awaiting trial.

Henry: Say the word "really". Moe: Really. Henry: Now say the word "really" with sarcasm. Moe: Really? Henry: More sarcasm! I want you to be very sarcastic! Moe: Oh really??? Henry: There ya go!

What's the difference between red paint and blue paint? One looks like blood and is used a lot in restaurants. The other is blue.

Why is there world hunger? Because you touch yourself at night.

Q:how many anti jokes does it take to make a person lough A:1

I walked a few Km from home.. Something stops me in my tracks, there lies A LIE!

On a scale from Casey Anthony to Sandusky, how much do you like children?

A mormon walks into a bar. He orders a caffeine free Coke.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Tourette's, Cheese on toast.

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "Only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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