Whats big, round, and full of helium? Michaels Balloon head!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

"knock knock" "ill get it honey" "no stay in the kitchen bitch!"

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why did the little girl fall off the swing. she had no arms so I pushed her off

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what do you call a 2-foot blue scottishman named max? max

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What is the worst part about being a blonde? Random green painted strangers throw forks at you claiming it will confuse you, because they got it off of an anti joke website!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: What kind of bees make milk? A: Boobees

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer

thumb_up thumb_down -7

When life gives you melons, youre probably dyslexic.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man walks into a bar and takes his seat. After a minute, someone shouts "133!" and this is followed by a couple of slight chuckles around the room. Later, "57!" is heard from the corner, followed by harsh laughter. After a while, someone shouts "66!" which is met by an uproar of uncontrollable laughter. The man, confused by the evening's events, asks the barmam what is going on. The barman explains, every joke has been told countless times so instead of reciting them, they are numbered and people call out the numbers. The man catches on to this, and therefore shouts "453!" which is followed by a deadly silence, because no one had heard that particular joke before, so 453 was just a number to them.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are red voilets are blue,you are gay so fuck you,!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what do you call a somone who murders someone else? black.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's the difference between a black man and a bicycle? ( I don't know. ) You're so racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the veterinarian say to the dog? Ohhh who is a good dog? You are!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

black guy graduating high school

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you get a Blonde to switch seats with you? Ask her politely.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A Palestinian and an Israeli both board a plane at the same time. They exchange awkward glances and take seats at different ends of the plane.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

This one time at band camp... I played an instrument and learned to march with the rest of my school's band.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why did the bear go into the woods to get shot

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What was the doctor's shirt made out of? Cotton

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the cat have hair? Because he did.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

The gay man came out of the closet.....Not that he wanted the world to know about his alternative lifestyle but because he is fairly wealthy and keeps his trousers on hangers in the rear of his walk in closet.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why did the chicken cross the road cause he was suicidal but a car just didnt happen to hit him.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What is blue and rolls ? A blue, rolling thing.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I like hats XD!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops