What is big, white, and hurts when it falls from the sky? A FRIDGE

what do a fish and wood have in common? when they're dead, they float

what is a model plus a poop plus a rhino plus a flamingo a peice of floob split in half or a shelby koon

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It was dead.

Jews

a 5 year old rapes a pedophile

Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? He had no arms… Why did he have no arms? Jimmy was a potato

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a T-Rex? There are certainly innumerable differences, but, in general, humans are vertebrates belonging to the Mammalia class, chiefly a member of the species Homo sapiens; dinosaurs are chiefly terrestrial, herbivorous or carnivorous reptiles from the extinct orders Saurischia and Ornithischia.

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Why did the koala bear fall outta the tree? He died. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree?? He was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree?? He had no arms. Why did the fourth koala fall out of the tree?? He thought it was a race to the bottom. Why did the fifth koala fall out of the tree?? Peer Pressure.

You're momma's so fat, Oh wait. She's not.

What did the one legged girl do when her apartment caught on fire? She tried to hop to safety, but died of smoke inhalation.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 murdered 4 and 5 then raped 10

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Drive an ax through its head.

What's worse than finding a hair in your soup? Slavery.

Why did Eduardo cross the road. The same reason he crossed the border.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the same wolf that had devoured the chickens' chicks singlehandedly was chasing it.

What did the Mexican say when a house fell on him? Nothing. He's dead.

Man is hit by a falling tree his friend immediately responds "Got Wood" the man is now paraplegic

What requires lots of rubbing, dirty pictures, and leaves you happy for a little bit, but then you realize you're sad and lonely? A minimum wage job where you clean pictures.

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Well I dont think that has happened to anyone ever so I guess nothings worse.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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