How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None, now stop hallutinating about wood chuck.

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What is black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Not black berries because black berries come from a bush.

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Why cant you find your handle? Because YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

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Q: How many light bulbs does it take to change a blonde? A: One, if she tries to swallow it.

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Why are hookers and babies so alike? You can have sex with both.

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but I'm your stalker, welcome to my deserted warehouse.

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Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Did the chicken cross the road? No because it was in a fenced in area like all farm animals should be

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What did the man do when he was tired Nothing he went to bed

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

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What did the pastor say to the rabbi? Hi (or some other greeting)

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Knock Knock Who's There? Due to the fact that the man asked who's there instead of promptly opening the door, the women on the other side was raped and killed, because she went to that house to seek help.

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How do you make a girl wet? Throw her in the pool

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"I have some good news and some bad news, which do you want to hear first?" The good news. "There is no bad news." Then what's the bad news? "There is no bad news.

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A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: What kind of bread would you like, brown or white? Penguins answers: Well, it doesn't really matter since I drove here.

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Q: What's the deal with air line food? A: An airline meal or in-flight meal is a meal served to passengers on board a commercial airliner. These meals are prepared by airline catering services. The first kitchens preparing meals in-flight were established by United Airlines in 1936. These meals vary widely in quality and quantity across different airline companies and classes of travel. They range from a simple beverage in short-haul economy class to a seven-course gourmet meal in long-haul first class.

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What happened to the little kid who went surfing? Answer: he gOt eaten by a shark

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A man see's a bird and tries to get its attention by whistling at it, much like if it were a dog. The mans whistle fails to get the birds attention because birds have wings and dogs do not.

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Why is the apple mushy? Because a car ran over it.

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How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None.

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roses are red violets are blue count my five damn finger , and the third one is for you!!!!!!!!

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A black teenage girl wants to get a job, unfortunately she is chained to a fence, beaten, and called a dog.

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A Man: Why does it seem as though you always find what you need in the last place you look? Another Man: Probably because you don't continue to look.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops