THAT MAN EATS TOO MUCH. therefore he is overweight.

Why did the girl drop her ice cream her cone broke

Patients: Whats happening doctor Doctor: I am afraid you all have tested positive Patients: Oh No!!! Doctor: Positive for being great friends all these years! Patients: Oh Doctor you are so.... Doctor: ASWELL AS AIDS!!!

Q: who's Snow White's brother A: egg white Get the yolk!

A Black Guy, A Mexican, A White guy, an Indian guy, Santa Clause and The Easter Bunny Jump off a 500 foot cliff. Which one dies? The all do. But Santa dies first because of his weight and mass.

A man walks into a bar and takes his seat. After a minute, someone shouts "133!" and this is followed by a couple of slight chuckles around the room. Later, "57!" is heard from the corner, followed by harsh laughter. After a while, someone shouts "66!" which is met by an uproar of uncontrollable laughter. The man, confused by the evening's events, asks the barmam what is going on. The barman explains, every joke has been told countless times so instead of reciting them, they are numbered and people call out the numbers. The man catches on to this, and therefore shouts "453!" which is followed by a deadly silence, because no one had heard that particular joke before, so 453 was just a number to them.

what's the difference between fulham and sunderland ? hugh grant and lilly allen's dad

What looks like a dick? A penis

What's Donald Trump's favorite color?

Roses are red, violets are blue my name is clearance, and i have to poo

a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x y z which one does not belong answer: none

Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 is a serial killer.

What's megan fox's bra size? Wait I got a fb notification brb!

here is Stevie Wonder's poem: sjkgfhdujduehfheuefeufhhf uefuefg eufbejfbefehfehutuge' wiohl;wreohqweiothurelwueths sjtghekltrhlsdifhlziurhlsiurhtwoli

Roses are red Bacon is red Poems are hard Bacon

Im So Hood... That When I go Shopping, I Buy Sweatshirts with Hoods

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Some guy stapled it to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A terrorist threw a refrigerator at it. Why did the girl fall off her bike? She was hit by 3 dead monkeys and a refrigerator.

mat: whats 2+2? emma: how long we lasted

Your mother is so ugly that people make yo mamma jokes about her

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didnt she get back up? She had no friends.

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender asks the rabbi "why the long face?" The rabbi says "to get to the other side." Seeing the puzzled look on the bartender's face, the priest says, "orange you glad he didn't say banana?"

What did the apple say to the apple? Nothing, they're apples.

Why does Santa Claus not have children? Because he only comes once a year.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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