What do you call a man who rides on unicorns? A liar. Unicorns don't exist.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

Two cowboys are in a kitchen. The first one says, "I feel at Home on the range!" To which the second replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he has never pursued his real dream.

a man walked into a bar "ouch"

How do you kill yourself You jump of a cliff

You might be a Redneck...if your job requires you to work long hours out in the sun and you do not take advantage of sunscreen.

Why did the womens basketball team beat the mens? the men were locked in a refrigerator

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "How's it going?" The man replies, "Bless you." The man walks out of the bar, as his peers realize he was honest when he told them a week earlier that he had autism.

Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she has no arms Why can't she get back up? Because she has no legs Why won't anyone help her up? Because she's a woman.

Why did Coolio appear in the joke below? He did not, he was not for real at this particular situation... Well It was actually a typo because some douchebag told me Coolio sang that song and I forgot to change the name after finding the truth... Moral: YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

A fish finds that his fishbowl is on fire. He escapes the bowl only to realize he is equally screwed.

So snoop dog drank some milk! :)

Why didn't the woman believe in God? Her own personal beliefs.

Halo < COD

Why did the chicken cross the road? why? Womens rights

Whats the difference between a Ferrari and 1,000 babies? The Ferrari is expensive and the babies are in a nice hospital.

Are you from Tennessee? Because I can tell by your accent.

Why is Cindy crying? She got a branch stuck in her eye which irritated her sensitive cornea so her tear duct produced a tear to help shed the material from her eye.

What do you call: A black person, A white person, A mexican, A Jew, And an athiest? Whatever their names are!

Knock, knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest!

Why did the first squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure. Why did Bobby fall off his bike? He was hit by 4 squirrels Why did bobby die? He was hit by a bus

Your mama is so fat, her gravitational field varies with distance cubed!

What did the cancer patient say after the little boy told him a funny joke? I'm dying

If life gives you melons you're dyslexic.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...