Why is an elephant large, grey and wrinkled? Because if it was small, round and smooth it would be an aspirin.

Knock Knock! Who's there? Joe Joe who? Your friend Joe OK come in

a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

why was your family so sad? because you died due to your uncle's son's cousin urinating all over you as a baby causing you to sting yourself continually. did i mention you were born as a scorpion while your family members were all human beings making them neglect and throw you away in their trash when you would always climb out. your family secretly hid affection for you. back to the beginning. when you died everyone in the whole world except bill cosby got cancer at the exact moment you died, but years later (because bill cosby is immortal), he got down syndrome after everyone who was alive during your death died. that is why he goes doo dop bip babbity today.

why did the boy fall of the bridge? He got shot in the head.

What do you call something with no legs? A Cripple.

what did the doctor say to the woman? I have 3 testicles

What's more addicting than a good book? Meth

A horse walk into the bar, the bar tender asked, why the long face the horse unable to understand English takes a shit and walk away.

Q: What's long and brown? A: The unemployment line.

Why was the black man escorted out of the bar? Civil rights is still a real issue in this country and must be solved.

What can you never have for dinner? Breakfast and lunch

A black man and a white woman walk out of a mall restroom holding hands and sweating. The white woman is arrested on the spot for statutory rape and sent to prison for 10 years. The black man was barely 16 years old.

Yo momma is so fat, that she is not able to wear the clothes she wore the previous year.

What's worse than a needle in a hay stack? A needle in a stack of drug addicts.

Moral Man Solid V: The Pain Phantom.

A guy has cancer. He dies.

What's funny about a blond, a brunette, and a red-head, drunk in a Cadillac? Everyone knows integration is a myth.

two penguins are sitting in a bath tub. one penguin says, "hey, can you hand me the soap?" the other penguin says, "what do i look like, a typewriter?"

What's my name? I don't know i was asking u.

A white guy, a hispanic guy, and asian, a black guy, a philipiean guy, and a wait what am i doing?

"My foot is killing me" "no, actually it's that noose around your neck"

What do you do when you fall of the horse? Consider calling the paramedics because it's possible that when you hit the ground your brain sustained damage and you should be rushed to a hospital immediately.

Have you heard about the Polish kamikaze pilot? No, you haven't, because it would be historically and culturally incorrect.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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