why do i want to get raped because then its not rape

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What do you call a black man sitting on his porch in the middle of the night playing a guitar? A Musician.

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Q: What weighs 6 ounces, is extremely dangerous, and lives in a tree? A: A sparrow with a machine gun.

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NASCAR

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Q: What's worse than dropping your phone in water? A: Throwing water at your phone.

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Whats the difference between a bad skydiver and a bad golfer? The bad golfer looses the game, drives home, and falls asleep. The bad skydiver dies in a terrible accident.

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Why couldn't the old lady take her Afghan Hound to the vet after the dog had been brutally harassed? She was dead.

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Roses are red, violets are blue my name is clearance, and i have to poo

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What is Ciaran Wilkie Gay

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Knock knock, Who's there? Jason. Jason wh-(death sound when being cut by chainsaw)

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Q: How many banana peels does it take to run down the street, true or false? A: Telephone poles don't have doors.

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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What did the guy say to the other guy? LOOK AT MY EYEBROWS!!!!!!!

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Cheese

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Your mama's teeth are so yellow... She should think about scheduling an appointment at a local dentist's office.

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This is an anti joke. Please make it the bestest and most well likeded one on this site.

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what is worse the Holocaust or slavery? patantan!

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, your Heart maybe splited into two but, if you love me i would fix it for you

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yo mama's so fat her stomach mass weighs more than people who dont have as much fat as her.

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Why don't people like this joke? It makes no sense.

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a boy says hi.The girl says bye. The boy starts to cry.

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What do you call a man who laughed at a joke that wasn't funny? A man who gets amused at the littlest things.

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Blind people can't read this.

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What happens when a PC gamer without a mic rages? ASDKFHQIUEWHASKZNF9324Y8PTWFSDIUHASDFADSFUFKASJDF843QADKJVNCXT%$W(ESDHDSFAAASDFASKLDFU8EWADSdsfalsdkjfhuewanzxcAJSKDFUIEW

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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