a boy walks over to the living room and shouts " happy birthday, daddy!!" the response is "i'm a cup, therefore i do not have a birthday because i am an inanimate object."

A duck sits down at a bar and orders a drink. After he finishes, he gets up to leave, when the bartender says, "Excuse me, sir, but you didn't pay for your drink." The duck turned around and said, "I'm sorry, I forgot." So he paid the bartender for the drink and left him a nice tip, and left the bar in a good mood.

What's the best thing about 27 year old's? There are 20 of them.

How do you make someone think your wierd? Pretend to be a panda.

Four rats are smoking in an alley. One rat turns to another and comments, "These are some fine smokes. Where'd ya score these?" The rat holding the pack of Menthols replies, "Off a' Fred." He points to a rotting whale carcass in the road. The other rats are horrified. "How did a whale die in the street?!," they squeak. "He didn't. He died on the beach."

I went river dancing once. I fell in

THAT MAN EATS TOO MUCH. therefore he is overweight.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Violets are not blue They are Violet

What white and black and red all over? The wife who refused to report that her husband abused her.

Q. Why did Mary fall down the steps? A. Because she had no legs.

After filling her car up with gas, a woman leaves the gas station with the pump still attached to her car. Why did this happen, you ask? It was a silly mistake anyone could have made.

What is blue and rolls ? A blue, rolling thing.

why did the imagrant cross the road the cops were on his tail for false identity of the chicken

:/ Meh, I am just a side character anyways... Dont really care...

Why do Christians believe in God? They made him up

Why did the woman cry? She was sodomized by wild animals

Whats the difference between a ferrari and a boner? Too much to list.

Recent US presidents (and their accompanying economy)

Knock, Knock ..... ..... No one is home, they've been evicted.

a man walks into a bar, and gets mauled by a bear..... and gets a concussion

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 killed 9.

What's black and flies? Whatever it is, it's not a car.

Knock Knock!! Who's There? No one, your being ding dong ditched!

Whats worse then any minority? inter-minority breeding.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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