what do you call anybody eating at mcdohnalds? hungry, diabetic people

Knock knock Who's there? Joke Joke who? Auntie Joke Great, could you bake me those cookies I like.

Knock Knock. Who's There? silence... Damn kids and their evasive tactics.

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all stranded on a desert island for a few weeks. They get to know each other really well.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't. Numbers don't have emotion.

Jack and Jill climbed up the hill .... and fetched a pail of water.

knock knock who's there? me josh! come in.

why was little johns' stomach in discomfort? because his mom accidently gave him mercury for breakfast

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because it had no arms. Why did Little Timmy fall off of his bike? Because he was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator. Knock knock Who's there? Not Little Timmy.

Why did I have sex with your mom? Because she was a beautiful individual with a fine taste in the classical arts. She also offered me a ride to her place for a delicious 3 course meal. Afterwards our romance blossomed and we decided to have sexual intercourse to show our mutual appreciation for each other.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

What do you call two mexican's jumping the border? people with a hard life trying to get to the new world.

If you analyze this joke closely you' ll realize its not funny.

How do you kill zombie Jesus? You can't.

So. The gays. ...

What's 6 + 9? 15.

What do you get when you mix a dog with speeding bus? Nothing, you can't mix those two things.

69

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

There were three people on a plane, the plane crashed and they all died.

What do you call a hispanic and black man flying a plane? A pilot and his co-pilot.

Whats red and hurts when you bite into it? A brick.

What's blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF What's white and fluffy? A BUNNY What's pink and fluffy? PINK FLUFF What's brown and fluffy? A PORCUPINE

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time is irrelevant in this scenario because if this question is based in the United States it is highly unlikely an elephant will be near a fence you own, let alone sit on it, an activity rarely done by elephants and usually projected by humans onto other animals.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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