Where does piglet look for Pooh? The hundred acre forest, you creep.

Why is jim retarded? Because he fucks chickens

how many prostitutes does it take to fix a lightbulb? it depends how much you pay them

More mindfuck "government hypnosis edition": What can doctors possibly do in order for you to wait enough for them to come to help you? They call you "their PATIENT!" Moral: So be patient and wait, oh thee brainwashed.

why are black people good at basketball? because they practice

I had sex. Just kidding.

what language does the turtle speak? i dont know I'm not a turtle.

How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagen Bug? Four, maybe 3, depending on the size of each person.

A bar walks into a man... Wait...

What did lady gaga call her grandpa? papaw razi. even wrote a song about him.

--"Do you like impressions?" -Yeah! --"Why?" ................... --"That was Socr-ates."

A muslim walks into a gay bar.

Hashtag

What do Michael Jackson and Whitney Houston have in common? They were both great singers.

what do you call a retarded kid? jack kamstra

How can you tell that your friend just had sex with a blonde? The girl he just had sex with has blonde hair.

Why was little Timmy an orphan? His family were slaughtered when he was three.

...NO.

What is the biggest fictional book ever made? Either the Bible, or the Dictionary.

why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the retard's house *knock knock* who's there? the chicken

wheres a place a cancer patient cant go? the hairdressers

What do you call a black man with cancer? A very unfourtunate man.

Two cows are in a field one cow says moo the other cow say shit thats what i was gonna say

How does Stevie Wonder pick up girls? He doesnt, he has someone do it for him

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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