Your mom is so ugly she plans on using you college funds for getting plastic surgery

Why couldn't the girl throw the baseball over the fence? She had no arms.

What did Super man say when the bullets didn't hurt him? That didn't hurt.

Penis

So a man walks into a bar, he meets a few friends, has a few beers, and at the end of the night he calls a cab to drive him home

If one of us goes, all of us go. If we all go, none of us are left out.

Why did the plane crash? Why? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why did the man name his son David? He didn't. It was his wife's choice.

what do you call 10 mexicans standing in a line? It's probably a lunch line for a taco vendor. And even this is just a coincidence. Everybody loves tacos.

A baptist priest walks into a bar with a boner.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear made her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

Why did the Mexican put away the Marijuana? Because he was a Police Officer

Your mother is a man.

How does Bob Marley like his donuts? He doesn't, he tragically died of melanoma in 1981.

A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

What's long, black, and sticky? Licorice.

So in Jimmy's school if u are misbehaving u are asked to get out of the room. Jimmy was in science, and he was throwing paper a bunch. Then his science teacher says, "Jimmy, do u wanna go out?" Jimmy replies "No thanks, I'm 14 and i have a girlfriend." That's how Jimmy got detention.

You're smart... And I can tell a joke.

How do you make a blonde scream? Set her on fire.

If push pops give life a push, Then isn't your mailbox purple?

What's longer then Hitlers gas bill Chris Browns Penis

John Kerry walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and says, "Hey, why the lost election?"

Hear the one about the deaf guy? Neither has he.

Jamie stegman has no life he is a nerd while his sister is giving him a z-j while jacob comes in and starts rubbing the lamp and then the crazy man ate the orange then farted in all of there face. NeonFAILsky xoxo

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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