a person smokes weed... and gets high

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 actually because, despite the potentially graphic nature of the previews, the creators scaled down mature content so that it could reach a wider audience.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's the difference between a dead baby and a man? One's tall the other's not

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do you get straight A's? Try really hard throughout the school year and when it comes to the exams study enough to ensure you understand all the material, but so so much as to compromise your sleeping pattern, and in turn, your performance on the day.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Vagina jokes aren't funny. Period.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

knock knock. Who's There? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Penis

thumb_up thumb_down +12

So a man walks into a bar, he meets a few friends, has a few beers, and at the end of the night he calls a cab to drive him home

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did Super man say when the bullets didn't hurt him? That didn't hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Your mom is so ugly she plans on using you college funds for getting plastic surgery

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why couldn't the girl throw the baseball over the fence? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the man name his son David? He didn't. It was his wife's choice.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the plane crash? Why? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what do you call 10 mexicans standing in a line? It's probably a lunch line for a taco vendor. And even this is just a coincidence. Everybody loves tacos.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A baptist priest walks into a bar with a boner.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

If one of us goes, all of us go. If we all go, none of us are left out.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the Penis say to the Condom? Nothing. The human organ is not able to talk to another inanimate object, therefore it's impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Once upon a time there were seven dwarfs. They were named Steven, Jason, John, Peter and Alfred.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why dont black people go on cruises? there not falling for that one again

thumb_up thumb_down +10

So in Jimmy's school if u are misbehaving u are asked to get out of the room. Jimmy was in science, and he was throwing paper a bunch. Then his science teacher says, "Jimmy, do u wanna go out?" Jimmy replies "No thanks, I'm 14 and i have a girlfriend." That's how Jimmy got detention.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How does Bob Marley like his donuts? He doesn't, he tragically died of melanoma in 1981.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's long, black, and sticky? Licorice.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

John Kerry walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and says, "Hey, why the lost election?"

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops