i ate and i ate and i was sick on the floor 8x8=64

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i have a white dog on my and have the strangest boner

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Oh, I must be hearing things.

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What is 9 + 10? 21

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Friends are like pickles. If you eat them, they die.

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You know whats funnier than 24? What? 25.

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What's black and white and red all over? A nun in a blender.

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What do you call a person with an arrow in their head? Dead

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was unaware that it could get run over by a motor vehicle.

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What's the difference between a turtle and a horse? The horse has no shell.

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How do you get straight A's? Try really hard throughout the school year and when it comes to the exams study enough to ensure you understand all the material, but so so much as to compromise your sleeping pattern, and in turn, your performance on the day.

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Bill is at a bar with a couple of his college buddies. He notices another one of his friends, Jim, who has his back faced to him, and calls him. The man turns and it is not Jim. Bill apologizes and they carry on with their lives.

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How do you know your sister is on her period? - Your dad´s dick tastes like blood.

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Q. What's worse than 400 babies going down the road at 80 miles per hours in a garbage truck? A. The same babies being dumped into a trash compactor

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What did the Penis say to the Condom? Nothing. The human organ is not able to talk to another inanimate object, therefore it's impossible.

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What is green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels part.

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Once upon a time there were seven dwarfs. They were named Steven, Jason, John, Peter and Alfred.

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Ring. Ring. Hello? Hey, It's Sean Oh hi! How are you?

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Dad, if I say shit or somethin... Dad: FALCOWN PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANCH!

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what do you call 10 mexicans standing in a line? It's probably a lunch line for a taco vendor. And even this is just a coincidence. Everybody loves tacos.

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What's long, black, and sticky? Licorice.

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why'd the women leave the kitchen? her chain broke

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A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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Did the chicken cross the road? No because it was in a fenced in area like all farm animals should be

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops