A new restaurant KKKcake

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "Only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

What the difference between water and water? Nothing, they're both water.

What's brown and sticky? Fecal matter.

Man 1: Nock-nock Man 2: Please leave my place of residence

A boy asks his father how babies are made. The father responds, "Babies are created via coital sex. A man rhythmically inserts his erect penis into a woman's vagina until he ejaculates. If his semen successfully fertilizes her egg, a baby will slowly grow in her uterus. After roughly forty weeks of gestation, the baby will be born."

Q: Why did the Klansman go up to acclaimed rapper and television star, Flavor Flav, and say "Do you know what time it is, boy?" A: Because his trademark "bling" seems to be an actual functioning time piece. Q2: Why did that same Klansmen brutally murder Flavor Flav after he learned it was 5:46 in the pm? A2: Becasue Flavor Flav is black and that's kinda what you're expected to do in the Klan...

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken is subject to speculation.

DOWN

What do you call a black person at a 7-11? A customer.

Why was the toddler laying in the middle of the road? Because she was the victim of a hit and run...

What did the Vietnam veteran see on Christmas that changed his life? Nothing, he was blind. He continued to live his life in the same way, begging for drug money and getting bullied by all the other homeless vets.

Hey i just met you and this is crazy, but heres my penis, so suck it baby.

What Can't You See and Stinks A Fart.

Why did samantha die? Because she had cancer.

whats worse than shitting in a urinal??? shitting in a shower

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he fell off a cliff

Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar. Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece?

why did the homeless man buy a mansion? he didn't. i lied. he would need a job to be able to buy a mansion.

Roses are yellow Violets are also yellow Please don't stereotype again

Jack and jill Went up the hill To go smoke Some marijuana Jack got high Unzipped his fly And asked jill "Do you wanna?" Jill sais "yes" Pulled up her dress And things got real fun But silly jill Forgot the pill And now they have a son

THIS IS SPARTER!!! :3

I can't remember if I have Azheimer's or not.

What is big, red, and beats rocks? A big, red, rock beater.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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