Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses only the finest ingedients.

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How do you get straight A's? Try really hard throughout the school year and when it comes to the exams study enough to ensure you understand all the material, but so so much as to compromise your sleeping pattern, and in turn, your performance on the day.

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What's heavy, black, and when hanging by a rope from a tree, makes white people happy? A tire, in any white football player's backyard.

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A proton and a neutron talk to each other. Two atoms are walking down the street one day, and one of them says to the other: "Hey, wait up a second. I think I lost an electron" The first atom replied, "Are you sure?" The second atom said, "Oh, wait. Never mind. I found it."

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Q: what do you call a muslim driving a plane? I don't know A: 9/11

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what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer we're both lawyers

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How do you make your children nice? You dont have any.

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Q. did u see Stevie wonders new house A. no me. neither did he

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Why didn't Jeffrey become a butler? He did become a butler.

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This guy says: "Doctor doctor, it hurts when I do this!" He jiggles his arm and screames in pain. The doctor replies: "Well, don't do it then!"

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Q:What did the hillbilly say when he lost his tractor? A: Where is my tractor

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What did the man do when he was tired Nothing he went to bed

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Vagina jokes aren't funny. Period.

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roses are red violets are blue i have deep vein thrombosis .... perpendicular albatross

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Knock Knock. Who's there? God. God Who? ::Apocalypse follows::

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Roses are red Violets are blue So is your face Cuz I just gagged you

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So a bunch of blondes are in a group and a murder comes by and sais, "if you want to live, answer a question right." so the blondes pick there smartest on. the first question is, what is 9+4... the blonde answers five, the crowd goes "give her another chance giver her another chance, same thing happens, she gets it wrong and the crowd goes "give her another chance, give her another chance." the murderer sais "ok fine this is your final guess, what is 2+2" the blonde goes "uuhhhhhh... 4?" And the whole crowd goes "give her another chance give her another chance

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Why do matt Daly jokes suck? Because he has Downs.

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Why did the dog cross the road? He saw a fish.

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Rabid squirrels attacked Blake's face as winged pickles perched on Phoebe's hair.

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What did the white guy said to the black guy, when he stepped on his foot? Excuse me.

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The man with a long history of Alzheimer's once said: Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cheese n' toast

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what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names...

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What happened to the village that got swept by a tsunami? It was destroyed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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