What is Freddie Mercury's favorite planet? Earth.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He didn't want to.

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Man goes fishing.... Catches Fish.

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What did the cat say when you rub it's stomach? Nothing because felines don't have the needed vocal organs to speak, and probaly wouldn't know english do to the size of there brain.

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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? usually one new yorker.

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Once, one man had a horse. And the horse had nothing against it

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roses are red violets are blue shut the fuck up or ill fuck you

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Why couldn't the girl throw the baseball over the fence? She had no arms.

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Two women are sitting quietly in a corner, minding their own business.

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So a bunch of blondes are in a group and a murder comes by and sais, "if you want to live, answer a question right." so the blondes pick there smartest on. the first question is, what is 9+4... the blonde answers five, the crowd goes "give her another chance giver her another chance, same thing happens, she gets it wrong and the crowd goes "give her another chance, give her another chance." the murderer sais "ok fine this is your final guess, what is 2+2" the blonde goes "uuhhhhhh... 4?" And the whole crowd goes "give her another chance give her another chance

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What do you get when you cross a third edition X-19 TQRFT scooter with a teal-colored pencil? A third edition X-19 TQRFT scooter with a teal-colored pencil on it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? You hit him with an axe How can you release your anger at somebody? Kill them How do you stop a bus? Throw small children at it

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A bear walked into a bar, unfortunately there were no survivors.

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why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

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What is funny about family guy?the jokes

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What's Casey Anthony doing now that she's not in prison? She's actually living life as an upstanding citizen in Florida.

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Why did the black man jump off a cliff? He's been emotionally unstable ever since he witnessed the brutal murder of his parents as a child and could no longer live with himself, so he decided to commit suicide.

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Why was the woman out of the kitchen? She was at her mothers funeral.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, Mitchell ate it before it could do so.

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DAMMIT MY IPHONE IS IN REPAIR AND I CANT GET THE APP!!!!!!!

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How do you drown a black man? You refuse to help him due to your pride and therefore you are no longer a decent member of society.

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Knock knock Who's there Your son and his vagina.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops