Never tell Alzheimer's jokes to old people. They will not remember them.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's the difference between an alcoholic and a drug dealer? An alcoholic is an extremely corrupted, and unhealthy living person. Though so is a drug dealer... They are both very harmful situations in many ways.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: What is the meaning of life? A: We don't know. Dwight: FALSE. The answer to everything is 42.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

what do you get when you have unprotected sex with a hooker? an orgasm

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Asians are a lot like spongebob They're terrible at driving and good at karate.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

i have a black person in my family tree he is still hanging

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? A: Names

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the bus crash? Because the driver was a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock kock ding dong ding di-ding dong zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz sigh weeeeeeeeeewooooooooooooooooo zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz hey yo wake up zzz-oh-huh-what-whos there i've been yelling for like five minutes oh sorry jim will you let me in already all right

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A dolphin walked into a bar, wait. . . dolphins can't walk, or go to bars.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: Hello, I'm a Jehovah's Witness and I would like to talk to you about religion for a few minutes. B: Thank you, but I'm not interested. A: OK, thank you for your time, sir. B: You're quite welcome. Good day. A: Have a nice afternoon. B: You too. Bye A: Ba-bye.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why the mentally challenged man enter the bar? He's tired of being subject hate and criticism. He hates being the subject of jokes and being pointed at. He may not be able to tell you what 3x6 is, but he still has feelings. So because of all these inconsiderate people judging him, he now spends his days at the local bar, drowning his sorrows away in alcohol. I hope your happy.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call women playing the sport of lacrosse? I dont think it matters because Women's Lacrosse isn't a sport.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Dislike this

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why was there two girls at the movie? They wanted to see the movie together.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had a gun.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the tree stay home from school? Because, trees don't have school.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How do you drown a blonde? You hold her head underwater for a long time.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's gay, has ten eyes and is gay. One D. Kelvin Yang.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A lady with no legs walked..... never mind

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A duck walk into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender hands him a glass and the duck drinks it. After finishing his drink he ruminates about how drowning his misery with booze won't solve a thing in his life. He decided he'll call his ex-wife and apologize and goes back home.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

sally stole a t.v what happend next? she was arested

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops