A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Q: How did the black man die? A: He got hit by a car, and we all know that this is painful.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

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Why do babies cry on airplanes? Because gay people are getting married.

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A young man spent his summer as an intern at a school. He eventually became a real estate agent but it was a pretty cool experience.

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Knock knock Who's there? Joke Joke who? Auntie Joke Great, could you bake me those cookies I like.

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Roses are red Violets are? blue I'm going to rape you in the ass with a rake.

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What's stupid and a waste of time? Anti joke .com because people on here are too ignorant and serious cuz it's not funny. It's anti joke G-Dang it. Come on seriously

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After dinner, my girlfriend told me that we should go to my room to play with eachother's toys. It was very fun, I've always enjoyed the plastic dinosaur she decided to bring over.

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Why couldnt the kid see the pirate movie? Because he didn't have eyes.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Joe Joe who? Your friend Joe OK come in

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Why did the baby die? I killed it.

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Why did the asian man crash into the stop sign? Because there was a frog stapled to his face.

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What happens to the man with cancer He dies Because the pharmaceutical company wanted to profit off a synthetic drug equal to marijuana

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What's funnier than poop? More poop

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What did the japanese man say to the other Japanese man? I like your eyes.

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How do you stop a black guy from drowning? You take your foot off of his face

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What did the man say to his brother? Nothing, because he just died in a tragic car crash.

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Siblings are like sharks, they usually stop biting you when you stab them in the eyes

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How do you kill a retard? Pour gasoline on him and light him on fire.

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Two 50 year old men walk into eachother on the street. one was born in a hobo shack and another was born in a mansion. what did the rich one say to the poor one? Hi, whats your name?

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Whats the difference between an apple and an orange? A banana because a motorcycle has no windows.

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What did the left nut say to the right nut? Nothing

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Why did the fat prick post on the internet? Because he was MorningAfterBoy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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