A hipster gets summoned for jury duty. The case is solved promptly and everyone goes home happy.

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A man walks into the doctor's office and says, "Doc, every time I drink coffee, my eye hurts". The Doctor then tells him, "You have an infection called conjunctivitis, also known as pinkeye"

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What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree it can hurt you? A pool table.

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q. what did the fat guy get from burger king a. heart disease

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guys ive got a TANK under my house a septic tank

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Let's see how many dislikes this can get!

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I'm so hungry I feel I would be able to ingest large quantities of food.

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After the haitian revolution, Haiti lived happily ever after, Until god smited them with a devastating natural disaster

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm about to kill you Don't scream, here's a lollipop

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What do you call a baby in a blender? Child abuse.

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Q: What is wrong on many different levels? A: Rape on an elevator.

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A chicken cross's the road it dies when a car runs it over

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yo mama is so old i told her to act her own age and she told me to shut up and get out of her house.

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A small boy called peter got stuck up a tree, a man walks past and said "how did you get up there?" peter replies "i fell"

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So a black and mexican go to the foodstore to get foodstamps.the end

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What did the homeless man get for his birthday. Nothing. Get it: He lived a life along with a giant family and on christmas eve 2012 he broke his kneecap and was in the E.R. He got out of the hospital on christmas only to come home to find a burning house; his house. Every member in his family died except for him as they were all in the house when it caught on fire. The house completely burnt and crumbled, and that is why he is homeless.

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what would Michael jakson do if he was alive? scream and hit the top of his coffin

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why did the little girl fall out of the tree? She didnt have any arms

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Q. What did the man say when his car broke down. A. Damn it, my car broke down.

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Your mom is so old so will die soon.

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Roses are red, violets are blue ive got a gun so get in the van!

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Johan showering. . . AWK

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why did the chicken cross the bread? because chicken salad

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There was an Englishman, an Irishman and a chest of drawers. The Englishman put a flask of coffee in the top drawer without even looking. Diane hates wrestling.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops