What do you call a man with a black book? I don't know.

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a man and a woman walk into a alley. They get mugged the man fights back out of pride and then gets stabbed the woman escapes and then goes to the police the man is then found two days later. *gasp* what a weird dream.

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Q: What were Peter's emotions after he bought his $2 million house? A: None, in fact he has no home, family and anyone to help him. his leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

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say yes will u remember me in a year?yes will u remember me in a month? yes will u remember me in a week?yes will u remember me in a minute?yes will u remember me in a second?yes knock knock whos there u said u will remember me u dick

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What is the difference between a baby and a tampon? A tampon doesn't cry when it's hungry or tired.

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Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's dead

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Where does lady gags buy her bran flakes ? Sainsburys

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is your refrigerator running? yeah oh, ok. just making sure your food doesn't spoil

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Why did the guy crash? He was texting.

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One day, on a train. 30 white, violently, racist people where crowding a black man minding his own business. An asian person walked through and was kicked, stabbed and stomped on until he died.

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An elephant walks up to a camel and says why have you got a pair if boobs on your back, the camel the replies that's a funny question coming from someone with a dick on their face.

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Why did the boy scream? Because his girlfriend poked him in the butthole, which he was not expecting. Thus surprising him.

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Knock knock Who's there Santa who santa hates you and that is why you got nothing for Christmastime

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What's the difference between erotica and kink? Erotica involves simple arousal; kink usually has an added element of masochism.

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What do you have when you take the gun, badge and uniform away from a cop? A man in his underwear.

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How did they wake up Lady Gaga? They p-p-poked her face p-p-poked her face......!

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How do you make someone cry Take all of their belongings

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Why did Jane scared of the video about a clown dancing in the room? Because it was her room.

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Why did the Mexican stop mowing the family's lawn? Because he felt it was time for his son to learn some responsibility.

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Q: what is the difference between a baby stroller and a black man. A: I don't try and hit black men when they cross the street.

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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Why does the sultan of Turkey wear red suspenders? So that his pants wouldn't fall down.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC.

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How did the boy die? Because he got molested and raped by a pedophile!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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