How many penguins does it take to cover a dog house? Purple, because the Ice cream has no bones.

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What is worse than using the toilet and then realising there's no toilet paper? A racially motivated massacre.

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Your mother is so fat, when she dives into a pool, the on duty life guard blows his whistle to get her attention. He then proceeds to tell her about the dangers of diving into a pool with the depth of 5ft or less and asks her not to continue her antics. She is not pleased but decides it is best to follow the rules.

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Why did the plane crash? There was a horrible mechanical error that caused the main engines to fail.

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What's big, yellow and green? The sun, i was kidding about the green

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SIMPLE EQUATION: John has 32 chocolate bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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A man walked into a bar, was surprised to find his wife with another man, and had a heart attack.

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why did the farmer cry after a phone call? he just found out his wife just died of lung cancer

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How much carlins does it take to screw in a light bulb? One

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Whats the XBOX JUAN's most popular game. Call of Juarez!!!

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Hearpin my durp

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Why did the boy fall down the stairs Because I pushed him

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What do you get if you cross a bulldog with a schitzu? A half breed prone to allergies and breathing problems.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Thats impossible because he cannot walk.

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Rather rich and healthy, then poor and sick.

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roses are gray violets are gray everything's gray I'm a #$%ing dog

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THERES AN APP FOR ANTI JOKES ? now thats not funny !

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What’s black and white and red all over? A zebra in a meat grinder

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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses? Because they often have to interact with violent and distrustful criminals.

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how did hitler fit 100 Jews in his car??? he couldn't, his car only fits 5 people.

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Roses are red. Violets are purple. Haha. Purple.

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How do you kill half the population of Mexico? A preemptive nuclear strike.

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What's worse than finding a fly in your drink? Gonorrhea.

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Do you like flowers NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO NOW GET ME A COKE! And a pizza

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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