Doorbell salesman.

In Soviet Russia ? ??? ??? ????????.

Parents: What do you want for your birthday? Boy: A yellow ping pong ball. 7th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball 13th birthday P: What would you like for you birthday son? B:A yellow ping pong ball. P:Hmm, fine. 17th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: That's is I'm getting you a car! Day before 18th the boy drives into a bridge. He lies in his hospital bed and his parents are there. P: What would you like for you birthday tomorrow? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: Fine. Why do you want these ping pong balls anyway? B: Because. And then he died.

What did the squirrel say to the owl? Nothing, because owls and squirrels don't talk, but the owl ate the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

bob saget

Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

2 guys walk on the street and see a pile of crap. One says "That looks like crap." The other one stops and looks at it for a few seconds and says "You're right it is crap." They both avoided stepping on the pile of crap and continued on their walk.

Your mamas so fat. She fat.

Wanna hear a funny joke? Look at the last joke.

What kind of coins to you find at the bottom of the ocean? Wet coins.

Why did Jerry Sandusky go to the shower room? He hadn't showered all week and was beginning to smell.

What do you call a guy being followed by about 30 others with high powered rifles? A military general serving for his country.

Q.whats the worlds funniest joke???? A.not this one this ones crap

Why could the girl climb out of the pool? She drowned

TEAM Together Everyone Argues More

What did Liberia say to Texas? Tag, you're it!

Yo momma is so fat, I gave her a cupcake and she enjoyed it.

A black man walks into a bar with a parot on his shoulder. The bartender says "Hey you can't bring that in here!" The Parot replies "Sorry i'll have him wait outside."

1:Knock Knock 2:Who's there 1: Your cousin tyler He was then brought in with the rest of the family to celebrate Thanks giving.

Yo Momma is so fat, she often chooses to take the elevator instead of the stairs.

Where's my tractor?

#1 rule in arguments: if losing, start correcting their grammar

What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

Why is a blonde a door knob... Because everybody gets a turn

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...