Your mom is so cheap, that she eats her cereal with a fork to save milk

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Q: What do you call a hobo asking for change? A: Get off my driveway!

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Knock knock Who's there? Hurry up, let me in! Hurry up, let me in, who? *gunshot*

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because he was dead. Q: Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? A: Because he was stapled to the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Your mother is so old that she is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What is worse than using the toilet and then realising there's no toilet paper? A racially motivated massacre.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q: Why was the duck hands down hilarious? A: It wasn't, ducks don't have hands and with human beings able to be equipped with emotions such as to see an object or living organism as funny, do not view these mammals in a humorous manner.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Two Haitians walk into a bar and it collapses

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the the chicken cross the road? Escape.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

27

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Who's a looser and has no friends??? Max!!! His address is 2131 HighHills Narrow...

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was hit by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did the liberian man say to the kid he just spat on? You have ebola. and probably aids.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

GOOD AFTERNOON KIND SIR OR MADAM THIS IS THE KUNDALINI EXPRESS MAY I TAKE YOUR ORDER

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call a guy who hangs around with musicians? A groupie.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How many WOMEN does it take to change a light bulb? YOU ALREADY KNOW ITS GONNA BE MORE THAN ONE!

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Guess how old my lil bro is...Well your wrong cause he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Two men are sitting on the couch watching sports, the first man farts, the second chuckles. They continue watching their program.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How much dirt was in a hole that was 6 feet wide and 6 feet deep? None. It's a hole.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A dolphin walked into a bar, wait. . . dolphins can't walk, or go to bars.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was Friday night (or Halloween or St. Patty's Day) and the chicken was at a party. He got totally drunk, and then got the bright idea that it would be okay to drive home. On a rural two-lane highway, his vehicle careened into the oncoming traffic lane, and then the ditch, thus crossing the road. Fortunately, he walked away with only a few scratches. However, he was cited for wreckless driving, and got a DUI as well.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Ask me if I'm a giraffe Are you a giraffe? Yes

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did Timmy fall off the swings? -Because he had no arms Knock knock! Who's there? Not Timmy

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A kraut walks out of a synagogue with no one dead

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops