A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

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a guy walks into a bar the barman says "what'll it be?"

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How does Helen Keller do her taxes? Unfortunately, she doesn't. Her friends have strongly encouraged her to proactively contact the IRS to see if she can undergo a repayment plan of some sort and obtain governmental assistance for her future filings.

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How did the boy die? Because he got molested and raped by a pedophile!

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what's big fat and hairy yo mamma

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My dog has no nose! Then how does he smell? Terrible!

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Sarah Palin, George Bush Jr and Glenn Beck are having a massive orgy with an illegal mexican immigrant, a member of the NAACP and an empathetic selfless homosexual democrat...no condoms were used because only felatio and cunilingus was being performed...

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What do you do if you see a bleeding Mexican in your front yard? Quickly respond to the accident and supply the wounded victim with first aid.

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what has 2 eyes but can't see... an asian

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What did the Wife say to her husband about his Erectile Dysfunction? - Im sorry I dont know how to finish a joke based on this private a matter.

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Why is Pawn Stars the best show on the History Channel? Because Pawn Stars is the only show on the History Channel.

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what did the short man say to the shoe? i sincerely hope that someone wouldn't try to carry a conversation with an inannnimate object, or else he is socially disturbed

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"Penis, penis, penis..." says Chase. That is all he likes and he fondles horse testes.

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You might be a Redneck...if your job requires you to work long hours out in the sun and you do not take advantage of sunscreen.

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What do you get when you combine Seth Rogen and Harrison Ford? A very risky and expensive medical experiment.

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Johnny Manziel is the best quarterback ever (this isn't a joke only a true statement)(this is a remake of a previous joke)

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The ability to beleive it's butter. Oh shit, wrong site

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she has no arms Why can't she get back up? Because she has no legs Why won't anyone help her up? Because she's a woman.

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Q:What is a black guy running with an iPod in his hand? A: A person who enjoys to listen to music while running.

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How do you make a model ugly? you shoot her in the face.

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Why were little Suzie's parents crying? Suzie was kidnapped by Al Qeada

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What did the cancer patient say after the little boy told him a funny joke? I'm dying

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Why can't Helen Keller hear? She's dead

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If life gives you melons you're dyslexic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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